Wisdom From Those That Came Before Us

I don’t know who wants to hear this right now, but I hope you will share this with anyone who needs it. I promise you, there are people you love out there right now who are scared, and they don’t feel like they can talk to anyone about what they are truly afraid of. You probably also have loved ones in high risk groups who are not afraid and who are ready to talk, but they may be quite lonely because no one will listen. 

As many of you know, I used to work as a hospice chaplain, visiting people in their final months, weeks, days, and hours, as well as sitting and praying at the deathbed after a loved one’s passing. I’ve had terrifying experiences as well as profoundly blissful ones, but every single encounter with death has been humbling. There were times I felt the pull of dark energies nearby and times I was floating in bottomless peace. Yet one of the most important insights that came from those families I had the honor to witness and care about was this: much of the fear of death is really a fear of grief. 

Where there is love, there is loss. Where there is loss, there is love. This is what it means to be a human being. This is what we signed up for. There is no need to wait until you or your loved one or the whole world is in crisis. Healing can happen now. Maybe not curing, but real healing. We can forgive ourselves, we can reach out and protect each other, we can draw boundaries and forge a new way, for as long or as short a time as we have left. 

I’d like to share with you again a Hebrew song from Kol Nidre, a holy of holy nights where all the individuals in the community together release unmet expectations, forgive broken promises, and start over completely. It has just two lines:

Kol ha-olam kulo gesher tzar m’od 
V’ha-ikkar lo l’faheid k’lal

The first line translates as:

“The whole world is a very narrow bridge.” 

We are being slapped in the face with this reality right now. The entire world is a very narrow bridge. Everything can and will be taken away from us. Eventually, what we have left is the spirit of who we really are—the pure essence only–and absolutely nothing else. This is nature. This is the existence we know. 

We can’t stop at just the awareness of the narrow bridge though! Stopping here has caused, at least in my lineage, chronic anxiety, worry, and fear for generations, a collective PTSD from a long history of sudden loss. No, we must absolutely remember the second half:

“The essential thing is not to fear at all.”


Feeling all the feelings, even and especially the grief and the fear.

Letting those feelings pass and moving forward.

Knowing necessity to be the mother of invention and finding creative solutions.

Taking the next right step in the direction of wellness and peace.

Changing alongside with change.

So yes, nothing feels secure. But what if we could dance across that narrow bridge anyway? I’ll do a little hip shimmy, maybe you’ll do the cha-cha. Both of us with our eyes wide open, balancing on one foot, then the next.

Fear, I see you! Fear, I hear you! Thank you. You remind me: I am choosing Love.


PS-I’ve been feeling called to write more in these times of isolation, so please do share this sign-up link with friends and family who may need some alternative messages coming into their inbox.  

PPS- I also write about this song in my early motherhood memoir of anxiety and personal growth, if you’re looking for reading material. 

Coronavirus: The Teacher

Friends, we’ve been living like automatons in systems we expected to function like clockwork, and the illusion is breaking loose right now. There is a lot of anxiety about change, death, losing loved ones before we had more time with them, being bereft of resources and assistance when we need it most. Fear, grief, and a control pattern that is the hallmark of the modern western world is being played out on the big stage right now. There is so much to learn here.

The mind wants to understand, and when it can’t, it seeks to control. That’s OK, it’s just what the mind does. Fortunately, we don’t have to base our command center in the intellect. Here are a few opportunities my heart sees coming along with death, loss, health and mental health crises, quarantines, cancellations, and financial meltdowns:

Interpersonal Courage

Whenever things seem uncertain and falling apart, it’s a perfect time to clean up your side of any relationship messes. There’s a process to this, of course, and support if you need it. But the gist is this: Do what you need to do, and say what you need to say. It’s so important to feel at peace in your own heart, knowing you did what you could do. From my experience working with the dying and terminally ill, I can tell you this: forgiveness is medicine for humans facing their mortality. Forgiveness can mean setting boundaries, ending relationships, and/or re-connection–whatever happens, the past is accepted and left in the past. What’s most important is clearing the mental, emotional, and energetic space inside so there’s room for more love. We all take our leave of this life eventually, though I am not bringing this up because I think we are all going down with the ship today. I am saying this because this is the healthiest way I know how to live what days we have left here with each other.

Adaptability with Generosity

Louise Liller, one of the most adaptable, generous people I know, recently wrote: “There are things we do for ourselves, and there are things we do because we live in community with other people. We wash our hands, not only for ourselves, but for others who may have weakened immune systems. I wash my hands for my friend who just had cancer removed from her brain. I wash my hands for my teacher who is in a coma and has pneumonia. I wash my hands for my childhood friend who was born with a genetic disorder that affected her lungs. I wash my hands because I care about other people.” There are easy changes we can all make to help one another. Washing hands, not taking all the supplies in the grocery store, calling elderly friends and anyone who already lives in too much isolation, just to lend a hand or let them know we care: this we can do.

Appreciation Celebration 

When the unknown threatens to break you, a little appreciation celebration may lift and strengthen your spirits—even if you are the only attendee. For me, this often looks like building a fire, beating a drum, singing and dancing, sharing some good news with my main support people, going for as long a hike as possible, or just checking out a flower. 

Dearest fellow humans, we are in this together. The way we’ve been living has caused us to forget how much we depend on nature, and how much we depend on each other too. Maybe now we can remember.

With the kind of hug who knows you’re in there,

For some comfort in the storm, sign up for my mailing list.

PS-If you need help releasing stress and finding your center again, please reach out to me or to someone else you feel comfortable with. In addition to weekly and biweekly holistic psychotherapy, I also offer healing sessions with guided meditation, sound, and movement both in-person and remotely. Regular emotional release is like drinking water for your body. Our feeling bodies need the flow of emotion coming through. For me, this work is best done through the physical body, with the spirit. 

Building immunity to the worry virus

Nearly everyone I talk to these days is feeling more anxious than usual, and what’s “usual” now is already a state of mild tension. Worry is highly contagious, and while the gentle souls with sensitive nervous systems are particularly at risk, most people are at least slightly vulnerable. Worry is not just a side effect of what’s going on in this world. Worry itself causes all kinds of health, mental health, relationship, and financial breakdowns. I am not suggesting you start worrying about how much you worry! But it’s time we start talking about the importance of clearing out the junk in our minds and creating health and balance there instead.

When bad things happen, and those bad things threaten to become more powerful, it’s tempting to go into major contraction, to hunker down and hope to be spared. But we all got on this roller coaster ride of life, and we all know being born means someday dying. So how do you want to be while you’re here in these times of uncertainty? How do you want to live this? If you don’t want worry to steal your joy, it’s essential to build immunity with embodied practice and mind-style change.

The first and most obvious preventative measure is to take in only as much information as you need to make good, practical decisions, and then sign off. Beyond this primary discipline, here are a few reminders for immunity-boosting:

(1) Regularly check on the state of your nervous system. Is your fight or flight switch stuck in the “on” position? If so, turn it off. Keeping that switch on when there is no immediate, present danger is like leaving the lights on in your house when you leave. The lightbulbs will eventually burn out, and you’ll have wasted a lot of energy. Just imagining the switch-off is sometimes enough; other times breathwork paired with intention will do the trick. If you don’t know how to meditate or ground yourself, it’s easy to learn. Just google or reach out for individual guidance. (Side note: for maintenance, no fancy therapy can replace the essentials of movement, rest, digestion, and touch.) 

(2) When worry takes hold after hearing about an epidemic, violent shooting, natural disaster, politics, or something in your personal life, make two lists: What I Can Do and Out of My Hands. Now you’ve got a To-Do list to act on and probably a much longer list you can happily be freed from. I personally feel such sweet relief when I catch a thought about something I can’t control and say to myself, “Thank goodness I don’t have to worry anymore.” On a related note, if you experienced trauma or negative conditioning from institutionalized religion, and it’s turned you off to the concept of prayer, maybe it’s time to reclaim your own connection to everything you can’t understand or control. Prayer doesn’t mean you need to believe in some kind of man in the sky or creed. Prayer can be the act of humbly recognizing you are but one small being in this unfathomable universe, affirming to yourself, “It’s OK. I can not fix this.” Afterwards, turn your attention to bodily sensations and your environment in present time. This is where the real action is taking place. Worry is always a game of negative make-believe.

(3) If you have any subconscious or conscious belief that worry is keeping you safe, question it. Have the bad things that happened to you been things you worried about beforehand? If so, how did that worry protect you when they happened? Who would you be without worry? When the analysis paralysis of those questions tires you, go have some fun. The best remedy for too much seriousness is some absolutely nonproductive, only-for-the-joy-of-it playtime. Tragedy desperately needs its comedy. 

Collectively, we are experiencing a flare-up of an already chronically inflamed condition. We are not the only people in history to go through turbulent times, but modern Western society has left many feeling separate and alone. We have the opportunity now to reconnect, to remember the preciousness of this short life, our loved ones, and all the many luxuries we have taken for granted. The harder it gets out there, the more softening we need with each other. You can make a difference for yourself and everyone around you. People with courage and calm nervous systems are medicine for this crazy world. 

Wishing you a total overflow of soothing relaxation and ease,


Sign up here to receive monthly reflections on community healing and self-empowerment.
PS–If you’re ready to set some boundaries with anxiety and worry, you can check out my holistic psychotherapy for women. Some clients come weekly, while others space out our sessions and do self-help practice in between. If I’m not the right fit for you, there are many other healers out there. What matters more than any particular certification is that you feel like you can be yourself in their presence. So if you haven’t found that support yet, don’t give up! Sometimes it just takes a little while.

PPS–Dearest Community Wellness Hour participants, CWH has been put on pause for a short time, as AOMA is following certain preventative guidelines recommended for healthcare organizations. I’ll be updating you on my newsletter as soon as we resume, but if you have other questions, please contact AOMA directly or check their website. My colleagues and I began this project three years ago in response to large-scale crises and rising levels of stress, so please know, we are committed to this community healing work. This is not the end; it is only a pause, or as I like to see it, a time to be reborn.

Taking the Blame vs Taking Responsibility

Are you pretty hard on yourself? In my experience, when something goes awry, some tend towards blaming external circumstances and other people, while others almost always point the finger inwards. If you are one of the latter, you may have been taking the blame for long enough, and perhaps it’s time to take responsibility instead.

Here’s the difference, as I see it:

Let’s suppose there is a conflict, a misunderstanding, or some kind of big interpersonal mess. When we take the blame, we are saying, “Oh no, I’ve done something wrong. It’s all my fault. I messed up, of course I did.” That litany can go on and on, all with the purpose of self-flagellation. The result? Feeling crappy about yourself and stockpiling reasons why you’re not a good person. 

Now take this same conflict, and instead of taking the blame, take responsibility for your part (and your part only). This looks more like, “Oh wow. I missed the mark there, and I am going to look at this further so I can make amends, starting from where we are now.” When you take responsibility, you acknowledge where you made a mistake, and you don’t beat yourself up because you know you are human, we all make mistakes, and you want to do better next time. It’s the difference between using what happens in life to prove you’re unworthy and using what happens in life to learn and move forward. The only way to make that shift, in my experience, is to develop a true friendship with yourself. One where you look in the mirror and say, “Hey, I really like hanging out with you all the time. You understand me even when no one else does.” 

That’s also part of the difference between taking the blame and taking responsibility. It is very possible that you did something that hurt someone else, and you didn’t mean to hurt anyone at all. Both can be true—someone else is hurt AND your heart was in the right place. With clear communication and an eagle’s eye perspective, we can see where we went off course and take correction for next time. We can ask forgiveness and know we are worthy of it, even if we don’t receive it from anyone but ourselves. And if someone is angry at you for more than what you actually did, maybe you don’t have to take the blame, and you can still have compassion for what they’ve been through. 

As I’m getting to know the amazing women in the release and empower groups (only one spot left, but you have to register before Sunday!), the question on my heart is “What happens when nice girls find their strength?” I’m not at all an advocate of becoming cold or uncaring. Considering other people’s feelings is essential to the entire world’s well-being. But many of us will break out of our shells and have SO much more to offer when we care a little less about what other people think. When you love yourself, you can clean up the messes you make instead of collapsing in them. You can hold others accountable for their parts without blaming either one of you. You can be a true friend to yourself no matter what happens next.

I hope this message speaks to you in some way that is helpful. If it doesn’t, I hope you send it straight to the trash without a second glance. Maybe this message wasn’t meant for you; maybe someone else needed to hear it instead. You get to decide what you allow in. I honor your truth, and I sincerely thank you for honoring mine.

May your heart simply overflow with compassion for yourself, and for everyone else in this crazy human existence,


Who do you want to be in the chaos?

Lately, I’ve been sitting with this question. I started contemplating it when a series of events involving structures crumbling, health breakdowns, and fallen leadership occurred in my personal life within the span of a few days. There’s nothing particularly unusual about this kind of chaos right now. The disruptive energy of change is here. There is no avoiding it. When everything starts falling apart at once, my automatic response is multi-tasking, over-helping, and overdrive. But that sort of high-speed crisis management is not really the best I have to offer, and I’ve been learning how to consciously shift out of that pattern more quickly. It’s actually not who I want to be in the chaos. 

I was sitting in the silence of Community Wellness Hour a few Wednesdays ago when the answer to my question came.

It was a tree.

A huge redwood tree, rooted in the mountains for more than a hundred years, reaching into the sky with branches that dance in even the strongest wind. 

But that’s not it!

Also a bird in that tree.

A bird like an eagle, or perhaps a phoenix. A bird who soars above, seeing what only one with such freedom and perspective can see.


A nest for that bird in that tree, made out of what is available. Holding what is most precious.

A safe place for the vulnerable growing strong.

There’s a whole lot going on out there, and in here. Change, especially big change, is messy. And change at a large scale is kind of terrifying. When the structures, the leadership, and the systems fall apart, as far as I can see, there is only one way to turn: inside and to each other.

This is exactly why I started the women’s release and empower group. If we don’t give ourselves permission and space to release the stress that builds up, no one will. We have to move through the chaos we’re absorbing so we can be strong, clear, and wise when we need to be. No one–no therapist, no doctor, no teacher, no guru–can do this for you. They can guide you on the path, but only you can walk it. We need to do our own self-healing work, and we do it best when we’re together. Only then can we show up with the kind of loving presence and courage that is needed in this crazy world.

One thing I know for sure: everything can fall apart, and you can still have your heart. There are a thousand examples of this. Take Victor Frankl of Man’s Search for Meaning or Anita Moorjani of Dying To Be Me. Take every brave person who keeps their compassion at a job in the hospital, the prison, the social service agency, the shelter, or the walk-in clinic. A holy mess is happening, and it may become the norm for periods of time. So I ask you, who do you want to be in the chaos? We are all needed here.

With so much faith in you,


PS– Let me know soon if you’re interested in joining us this winter/spring for Release & Empower! There are only a few spots left, and the early bird registration discount ends January 10th. We’re looking for women who do a lot of caregiving at work or at home, women who are good at doing what needs to be done but who need more healthy release in their lives! This season, the group meets Thursday evenings in south Austin. It will be a beautiful way to start the new year with intention and care. Details here!

From Fall to Winter, Release & Empower

This Sunday we ended the fall series of the Release & Empower group. It has been a real honor to hold space for such brave and compassionate women. I will also miss having the circle in this fun and powerful space! The next series of Release & Empower will be on Thursday evenings, beginning on January 23rd at Pure Light Chiropractic (near 71 and Manchaca). It is sure to be another incredible group, as it is already more than half-full with women who know they need the space for release. There’s an early bird discount going on now, so check it out and get in touch soon if you’re curious!

An emotional forecast for the holidays

I’ve been getting to know Tony, our new mail carrier. Though his day job takes up most of his energy, his passion is screenwriting, and he recently enrolled in a screenwriting course at the nearby community college. His ideas are beautiful, like a Pixar version of why bad things happen to good people. What he went through as a kid made him into a mystic, and he wants to offer hope for young people that are struggling.

Tony and I originally connected because a Sports Illustrated had been mistakenly delivered to my house. I was on my way to walk it over to the neighbor’s house when I met up with him. Tony later told me he was afraid I was going to yell at him, since that was how residents often approached. He was very surprised when I came up to him with an easygoing manner, and he wanted to know why I was like that. Now the fact that friendliness is an anomaly is something to think about in and of itself. But more importantly, we’ve got to stop yelling at the mailman! I know most of you don’t, but that doesn’t mean we don’t want to. It’s not because one little problem is so awful; it’s the buildup of all the hard things. Maybe there are minor inconveniences in your daily life, but add them on to big transitions like death, divorce, job loss, breakups, miscarriage, financial crisis, natural disasters… well, eventually some of that stress explodes somewhere or makes you sick. What’s more, the holidays are approaching. Which means bells of holly and all kinds of family trauma, loneliness, grief, and the existential despair of consumerism. 

This November-December time period brings out all the emotional weather, so it’s also a season for preventative self-care. How do you maintain equilibrium when known stressors are coming? One reminder I give both myself and my clients is to make the time and space. If you need to release frustration and anger, you can go somewhere private like the parked car, and let that wild one roar! If you’re feeling frantic or trapped in a social situation, you can excuse yourself to the bathroom, and let every part of your body shake it out. If you can’t access emotions because they’ve been stuffed inside for so long, there are all kinds of strategies that can help you get things moving again. Stress release is not just about vomiting feelings. It’s having the intention to release them so you can move on.

The other factor we see coming is the tendency to overcommit and become too busy during the holiday season. It’s not the easiest time to start new programs; there’s just too much else going on. So less is more right now. At the same time, you may be feeling like you don’t want to keep playing the same dramas on repeat. The holidays often point a glaring finger at what’s not working. If you’re someone who takes care of other people’s needs a lot, the wear and tear of responsibility may be showing up, making these months feel draining and hard to enjoy. 

I don’t know about you, but as a caregiver professionally and at home, it’s just not sustainable to let stress run my life. If you already know you’re going to need some support starting over in the new year, registration is now open for the next Women’s Release & Empower group. Though the series doesn’t begin until late January, if you decide to sign up soon, you’ll be eligible for the early bird registration discount. Imagine weekly mini-retreats to soothe your mind, body, and spirit after all the holiday craziness is over. Could be a gift for the new year, if you ask for it! All the details are here. 

Maybe you cherish the holidays and enjoy the generosity and celebration. Or maybe you love it AND it’s also hard for you. You don’t have to avoid or repress the painful parts to enjoy the rest. It’s possible to experience both the light and the darkness that comes with tradition, family, and wintertime. Like we do with the breath all day long, we can let it in and let it out. With plenty of forgiveness for the times when we forget, we can always start again.  

What’s the moral of your story?

Someday, I’d like to tell you more about my friend Stephen. Stephen was addicted to heroin for eleven years, from the age of 19 to 29. In his former life, he stole from, lied to, and abandoned the people he loved. I didn’t know him then, but I know him now. My first thought when I met him, before we ever spoke, was that his eyes looked like those of a newborn baby, just full of wonder. There’s a certain gentle, open-heartedness about him that can’t be faked. Stephen is still a brave and independent person like he was in his youth, but his new life leads him toward adventures that inspire rather than ones that devastate. He’s going back to school to be a counselor, and I know without a doubt he will help many people over the course of his lifetime.

How did that transformation happen? Well, first I also want to tell you about my friend Creta, a former firefighter who has become a dear friend in Colorado. For a long time, Creta suffered from health issues related to her thyroid. After putting it off for years while the condition worsened, she went to the hospital for surgery two weeks ago. When the prepartory lab tests were run, the blood work suddenly came back normal. She was sent home because she didn’t need the surgery anymore. 

These are both absolutely beautiful people with fascinating stories to tell. The specifics are different, and I won’t go into them here, but I can tell you they have both experienced great healing of the heart. I knew I wanted to share their stories with you all, but I wasn’t sure how to talk about them without writing a whole dissertation on self-healing. So I told my eight-year-old daughter these details about our friends, and asked her. “What do you make of this? What’s the moral of these stories?”

“Find your connection,” she said.

She is so right. That is what they both did, and they are not the only ones either. Look around you, and you may start to notice. The darkness in our world today is bringing out some brilliant light. The miracles are here if we are ready to listen to and see them. It doesn’t matter what name you give to what you are connected to or if you think you are connected to something or not. What matters is the feeling of connection

Knowing love in your heart and believing in it more than you believe in the permanence of your suffering.

It’s very hard to believe in love when you’ve had your heart shattered. It’s hard to believe in connection when it feels like your life is falling to pieces. But I’m talking about a different kind of love and connection, more even-keeled than the human form. It is fundamental to radical transformation and healing. This dialed-in, equanimous way of being doesn’t come easily to most of us, but it can be learned if the intention is there. One thing you can do to feel more connected right now is to start looking for miracles. Notice the big ones, like the healing Stephen and Creta experienced, and the small ones, like the perfect spiderweb I saw on my window pane this morning. If you are on the lookout for miracles, you’ll find them everywhere. Maybe you’ll take a little extra time to listen to a stranger, and you’ll be that miracle yourself.

What’s the moral of your story, dear one? What do you want it to be? That story is being written right now, and I bet it deserves a good read. Meanwhile, I’ll be wishing you the felt knowledge that you are not alone here. Whether or not you’re aware of it right now, you are very loved.


PS—Inspiration is beautiful, but the real work is an investment of energy towards the shift you are ready, or want to be ready, to make. If you’re a woman struggling with anxiety, grief, or big life transitions, and you feel called to dive deeper into self-healing and empowerment work together, 1-1 or in a group, let me know.

When you’re misunderstood

I shared in the women’s group this week about being misunderstood, how it hurts the heart but is also none of my business. If someone sees me differently than I am, I have to remember there is a character I play in their story. That character may look just like me, but I don’t know her that well. She doesn’t have much to do with the main character I play in my own narrative, the one who makes lots of mistakes but usually has pretty good intentions. It’s super important to me to clear misunderstandings with other people, but not everyone shares that value or wants to meet in that place of mutuality, the one Rumi describes as the “field beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing.” Sometimes, I have to accept that I will play the enemy in someone else’s story, no matter how hard I try to make things right. Still, I don’t have to hold a grudge just because someone holds one against me. 

We are now moving through the Days of Awe, also known as the Days of Repentance, a ten day period in the Jewish tradition of taking accountability for one’s self and asking forgiveness where we know we’ve misstepped. I love that there is community time set aside for this practice, as I can tell you especially from my work with grief and dying, that it really matters. No one likes to leave here with important things left unsaid and undone. But just because we try to make amends doesn’t mean we will be received with open arms. That’s when self-forgiveness and boundaries become so important. 

Boundaries mean we get to choose the state of our innermost being. You can offer love, but whether or not it is received isn’t your responsibility. Your greatest responsibility is to that quiet place inside your own heart. And so, even in this period of accountability, all relationships will not be healed. The messes may still be kind of messy. All we can do is clean up our own side and make sure we put out the welcome mat. 

Sometimes I make little cards out of my daughter’s old preschool paintings. Today I pulled this one:

I thank the friend who first said this to me, and I wish this self-acceptance for all of you as well. If you are coming from the heart and doing the best you can, it is most certainly enough. You have the power to forgive and to start over. No one can take that from you.

Wishing you strong and healthy relationships, especially the one you have with yourself,


PS–If you’re going through some challenging times with self-forgiveness and letting go, here are some October offerings to support you in your own growth and healing:

  • Counseling and Hypnotherapy for Women: currently three openings, in-person and remote options available M/T/Th/F, schedule a free call here
  • Changing Along With Change: Hypnotherapy for Life Transitions, a Restoring Balance Luncheon at Seton Cove on Tuesday, October 22nd
  • Community Wellness Hour at AOMA every Wednesday (note: we had to change rooms because we  outgrew the old one–find us now in room E1) 
  • The Women’s Release & Empower Group is currently full and closed for the fall, but a new group will be starting in late January. Check my website for more details or get in touch if you know you’re already interested

When you let it all in

Do you ever feel like you do your yoga, meditation, running, breathwork, tapping, journaling… but you still feel stuck? It changes my perspective on this passage from Rumi’s beautiful and wise poem, The Guesthouse:

“This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture.
Still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.”

Sometimes we lock the door, bar the windows, and stick fingers in our ears to avoid meeting the shame, rage, or fear that comes knocking. But other times, perhaps, not only do we let these visitors in, but we also give them a bed to sleep in and three solid meals a day. Maybe these emotional guests have become roommates that never clean up after themselves or leave the house!

Anger is a good example. If you don’t let anger in the guesthouse, she’ll get madder and madder. You’ll need barricades to keep her out, and eventually she’ll bust through. But what happens if you let her in, and she refuses to leave? How does one honor anger and let her come and go as need be?

I often tell my children that letting out anger and stress is like needing to throw up. When you feel sick to the stomach, trying to hold it in is going to make you feel sicker. It feels much better to just throw up. However, it really is best to find a toilet or a nice tree to receive your purge. It’s not a good idea to throw up on your friends and family; they may run away from you to clean themselves up. Same with anger, which can make us feel sick with resentment, anxiety, or depression when we don’t let it out. Still, we don’t want to vomit anger onto other people; we need private spaces where the purge won’t mess with anyone else, and we can experience the relief of release. 

As stress levels increase all around us, so must our attention towards de-stressing on a regular basis. Our nervous systems aren’t meant to be on high alert all the time. We can’t keep turning away emotions because they arrive at inappropriate times, nor can we let them start camping out in our closets. This is why I’ve become so passionate about simple emotional hygiene and the process of inviting it all in and allowing it all out.

I’m hosting a FREE workshop for emotional release on Saturday. While it won’t be the same level of depth and consistent support that we’ll have in the upcoming group program, it will be a gentle introduction to that work, a safe women’s space for letting go. It’s a chance to remember you’re not alone in your need to continually release. It’s just human nature.

The guests who come in as anger and stress may actually leave as clarity and empowerment. Anxiety and worry may say goodbye as excitement and prayer. We’ll never know until we let them in. We just can’t forget to also let them out!

Wishing you all the balance and well-being that your heart desires,